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Sunday, May 8, 2011

Scars of Mirrodin: The Quest for Karn - Chapter 13

In the shortest chapter of the book, just three pages on my Kindle, Wintermute is able to pack together the most dense amount of nonsense and confusion yet. Oh, and I have a confession. The previous chapter didn't end where it did. I left out the last couple paragraphs off that long eventful chapter. We'll begin with that.

Scars of Mirrodin: The Quest for Karn - Chapter 13

Our heroes had convinced themselves they could learn more info from their suspect guide. And what happened last time when they decided to follow someone who's motives likely weren't pure? They make it to some destination, go to sleep, and wake up with their guide gone. At least this time they weren't trapped in some claustrophobic room and they're able to walk around. And just like last time, it's no big deal and in no time at all they find their guide sitting alone chewing some something and spitting on the ground. (Guess he just wanted to be polite and not be spitting around them.) Before they go with the guide leading the way, Venser notices that the guides boots were "newly made." You know what that means right?

New boots could mean all sorts of things, most of them bad.

But bad news shoes or not, they followed their guide through a door and the darkness beyond.

(That is the true end of the Chapter 12. See why I skipped it? There wasn't really much to it, except the shoes thing I suppose. But then...)

Our heroes are walking around in the dark lost and wondering where their guide is. Sometimes he's by their side and sometimes they don't. And it's not as if he's put them on their path while he scouts ahead to make sure the path is safe because they turn around and head back through the door they just came through which may or may not have been the door that ended Chapter 12.

Out of nowhere, Elspeth brings up the situation with the darksteel bowl. (Whoa. Like the ore soup lady, there may have been a reason for that scene.) She then asks if anyone remembers how many hearts were in that bowl, and Venser immediately responds with the very specific thirty-three despite that number not having been mentioned before and Venser not having actually put his hands in the bowl to be able to actually see all the hearts which are no doubt stacked up on top of each other like hearts in a bowl would sit. (I know. I have a bowl of hearts next to me right now.)

They ponder what would the use of those hearts would be, and Koth then says:

"What if something took them?"

(Riddle me this: Does he mean what if something took those hearts and put them in the bowl? Because the obvious answer is "yes", because we saw that little Phyrexian do it multiple times. Does he mean what if someone took the hearts, while he simultaneously knows the hearts were right there so obviously "no" no one took the hearts that are in the bowl. Or does he mean what if someone eventually took the hearts after they left, to use for some other purpose? The answer is again is an obvious "yes" because of how deliberate the hearts were being prepared for a still yet unknown reason.)

(Is there any way that line is not idiotic? Someone tell me please!)

Is he trying to say, "What do you think those hearts were going to be used for?" in the most awkward way possible? If so, that's not how Venser answered him.

"Something might have. Maybe that small silver creature that led us for a time," Venser said.

(What? Unless they didn't believe when Tezzeret said that their guide was actually working for him, maybe he thinks Tezzeret wanted some heart soup.)

Their conversation barely drifts back to the suspicions on their current and non-present guide when Elspeth asks:

"Why would the silver creature lead us and then disappear?"

(*sigh* I guess they and/or Wintermute has forgotten that the silver guide was an agent of Tezzeret. If they were doubting the validity of his claims that'd be one thing, but they're not.)

Venser then sees some oil in Elspeth's hands and out of nowhere starts thinking that the more time he spends around her, the less he feels he knows about her, and the less he trusts her. All of a sudden he no longer remembers the backstory that Elspeth had told him and how that touched him to the point that he defended her against Koth accusations, and feels like he has no comprehension as to why anyone could feel such intense hatred like she has against the Phyrexians.

Our clueless, clueless heroes stop their crazy talk and come across some tube that seems like a good direction to take. Elspeth asks if they should, Koth angrily says why not as if she insulted his dignity, and then their guide steps out of the shadows and says that they may go that way. Koth and Venser has a confusing spat about who actually leads the trio, but eventually they all go in.

(By all, I assume that includes Melira, but you know, the cure to the multi-plane spanning infection known as the Phyrexians isn't important enough to mention, and isn't worth talking to or hearing input from. She needs to be a good cure and speak only when spoken to.)

Venser thinks he hears the mad ranting of his friend Karn before the sounds fade away. Except Karn doesn't madly rant.

* * *

I Give Up

I just... I give up. Let's move on.

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